Welcome, 2013!

While you would probably agree that I've been a pretty positive person this year, despite the challenges I've faced ... I can't really say I'm sorry to be closing out 2012. While you never want to wish away the precious years of your life ... the end of 2012 parallels the end of my medical battle against breast cancer, and that is one thing I'm very ready to finish.

It was almost 10 months ago that the battle began. And these are the words that have shaped my 2012 ... mammogram, sonogram, stereotactic biopsy, cancer diagnosis, needle biopsy, MRI, contrast dye, blown IV and repeat MRI, bruises from needles, Team Lisa, PET scan, echocardiogram, chest x-ray, EKG, outpatient surgery for medi-port, another IV, wig shopping, Pink Shamrocks, Race for the Cure, 21 weeks of chemo, anti-nausea meds, infusion clinic, numbing cream for my port, how to tie a bandana and be comfortable wearing it in public, antibiotics, shingles, more bloodwork appointments than I can even remember (20+ since I had to have one for each week of chemo), sleepless nights due to 20 weeks of steroids, endless appointments with my 4 new doctors (surgical oncologist, medical oncologist, radiation oncologist, plastic surgeon), hormone therapy meds, another mammogram, another sonogram, pre-surgery preparations, more bloodwork, another IV, mastectomy, incision care, hospital stay, liquid diet, surgical drains, recovery, two CT scans, 28 radiation treatments, red and blistering skin, radiation lotions and ointments, gel bandages and just general discomfort. And the big one ... SURVIVOR.

Insurance claims totaling $263,000. As of December 1, with the bulk of the radiation charges not yet in. Thank goodness for maximum out-of-pocket terms on insurance plans.

More words shaped my work life ... thankfulness, friendship, shorter work days, medical leave, support.

As as you can imagine, other words have shaped my 2012 on a personal level ... fear, concern, mortality, family, friends, bucket list ... faith, hope, love and luck.

Several people who have walked the cancer path in their own lives told me very early on that I would find blessings in my life while dealing with all of this. And I'd say I started seeing those blessings right away ... from personal relationships that lost their tense nature and became more kind to forming new relationships with strangers who were walking the same path or providing me medical care. And the blessing of having an employer who in my case is not just one single supervisor, but rather a group of kind and caring people serving on a Board of Directors who shared hugs, tears and support and just simply said, "Take whatever time off that you need. Just focus on you, and get better."

I've interacted with a large number of medical personnel at my 4 doctor's offices, the breast health center and the two hospitals I've been at for tests and surgery. Even the RN's in the infusion clinic had a way of making the chemo process "light" and there are smiles and laughter in that room, which I would have never guessed possible. I've shared hope and hugs with the other patients, most of whom were strangers before, whether we were seated next to each other for chemo or waiting in our hospital gowns for radiation, or sharing a knowing look with another woman in a bandana ... I know her angst, I live in her world of concern, I'm walking her path. Right down to the valet parking attendants at the hospital who got to know me after 20 consecutive weekly blood draws and left my car on the entrance circle instead of taking it to the parking garage, making my wait to get my car back shorter ... there are blessings, and they are many. I suspect those blessings are in everyone's life, every day ... and you only really see them when you slow down, and change your perspective.

So I say a willing goodbye to 2012, even though it held personal joys such as Drew's college graduation, TJ's start of high school, our 30th wedding anniversary ... and I plant myself fully in the hope of 2013 bringing what I need the most. Faith, hope, love and luck.